making big lifestyle change is HARD.
changing habits is HARD
learning how to use new unfamiliar tools is HARD
I have been looking for an easy answer on how to make these changes. I have been scouring forums, chats, books, websites, any place where I think I may find the answer, the “12 step program”. I lament with other folks in the same position. I asked questions to the folks who have made the change, who lead the lifestyle I want to live, trying to find the answer, the way.
I have been looking in all the wrong places for the answer. I have been looking outward, I should actually be looking inward. this change is one that is very personal, one that I have to make within myself. no one can tell me how to change myself but me. I have to look within to find out how to break my own habits. I have to spend time with these new tools to learn how to use them. I have to make mistakes, I have to fall down and pick myself back up again. I have to do this within myself.
I am thankful for the resources that I have found out in the world, they give me hope and knowledge and tools and courage and strength. Ultimately it is ME who has to find my path to this new lifestyle. I cannot follow the path some one else has taken, I must forge my own.
Looking inward is very important.
ReplyDeleteOne of the things I have always found helpful when dealing with a situation that requires change, or that feels uncomfortable, or if what I'm doing feels somehow "not right" is to examine what that means, really.
Some of the questions I ask myself include:
Who says this is right/wrong? Do I value their opinion? If so, why?
Where are my feelings coming from? Now, or my past?
Why do I believe the way I do about this? Is it really my own belief, from experience and careful consideration, or is it a culturally imposed concept that I haven't really examined?
If I do this, what or who would it hurt? Anyone?
If I really look at the situation, what part does fear of embarrassment play? Fear of being embarrassed, or looked down on, or considered "odd," is one of the strongest motivators in this culture- am I letting it drive my choice?
If I look back at this 20 or 30 years from now, what would I want to see? Could I explain my choice to myself then? To my kids?
Am I choosing what is better, or what is easier? (Consider that sometimes, easier IS better. But not always.)
Best of luck, and enjoy!
you are so right, the place to look is inward. fortunatley i have asked those questions and this IS the change we want! now it is time to change the habits. not the easiest thing, not anything anyone can tell you how to do.
Deletei think we are still in the stumbling stage. we stumble, we learn, and we will eventually find our natural.